The title of this post is a hat-tip to the DADAANG family, who have (in all probability) recently added another first-rate punner to their ranks. Congratulations, guys!
In addition to four periods of physical science, I also teach one section of "corrective math." "Corrective math" is, as the name implies, a sort of remedial class for students whose math skills need to be brought up to speed. These courses are very remedial for high school. For instance, the first workbook they work through is addition. Then, after about a semester -- or potentially more -- they finally move on to do a whole workbook on subtraction. Then, multiplication, then division, then ratios and fractions.
When you teach corrective math, you are supposed to read a script (that's right, read a script) while the students do problems, which system is more than slightly insulting to teachers as professionals, but I digress. I don't read the script, because I actually don't teach a whole class. I teach a "pullout class." This means that I only teach about five or six students from another class that either were causing problems in the larger class, or were able to move much faster on their own than the script allowed.
There are just a few kids, so we can get to know each other pretty well. We can get into highly stimulating conversation. Like the other day, I was helping one of my students with a problem; he was writing it on one of my chalkboards so that I could watch and tell him where he made a mistake. He ended up getting it wrong by an order of ten because of an error. When I told him the right answer, he was like, "I was close." and I said, "that's not close, that's like if someone said you were 140 instead of 14. That's a big difference." And he responded, "that's not a big difference, a big difference is a cat and a dog stuck together." I asked, "what?" And he said, "A big difference is like a cat and a dog stuck together."
A big difference
I thought that was really great, and, as you might have suspected, this has all been a ruse to get it down for posterity.
Not amused? Well how about this question, from a recent group worksheet:
1. Increasing the AMPLITUDE of a LIGHT wave will change the light in what way?
| a. The light will change colors | b. The light will get brighter |
| c. The light will get less bright | d. The light will change into an otter |
Unless you are a teacher, perhaps you can not believe the immense satisfaction this question gave me. All day long, students would ask, "what's an otter?" and I would explain in my very most patient teacher tone what an otter was (where they lived, etc.), but I would prudently allow them to draw their own conclusions. This is called student-centered learning. They'd look at me, then look at their paper, and then haltingly consult their group-mates. Ultimately, most would conclude that changing the amplitude of a light wave could not possibly change light into an otter. See, they're really learning! Here's where I'd put that youtube video of otters, but I can't figure out how to post youtube videos. Anyone else want to tell me?
A simple graphic shows that only changing the
frequency of light waves can get you an otter
I might as well put a video of a the double-mouse catch here too. I realize this entry is a disaster, but let's face it, Declan's about to hit the internet and all else will be swallowed up in a wake of total obscurity, so this is a good time for some indulgent for-posterity note-taking. Did you watch the video? Two for one! In case you were wondering, Victor mouse traps are the best. Remember when we were going to make coats out of mouse skins, Gregan? Well, I could totally do that these days.
5 comments:
You da man!! I'd love to be in your class... Aside from the rodent problem. Well, maybe there are a few other concerns I'd have. But I can see you asking your captive audience some of those questions you peppered me with as you were growing up. I still remember walking around the cemetery with you and Gregan trying to play 20 questions about rain forest trivia. I didn't know enough to even think of possible questions! Just think about the horizons you're expanding for your students. They just THOUGHT they were getting math lessons... You look very smart, too. I mean, I'm impressed with the dress code for teachers. (Please do NOT make any coats out of mouse skins, though...) Grreat post! :)
I think I should clarify the whole mouse skin coat thing or people might think we are strange. The coats weren't for us, they were for our NINJA TURTLES. I believe it all started when we found out that mice lived in our garden. We wanted to catch them, but didn't feel right about killing anything unless it served a purpose. See? That's normal. But since you probably don't have ninja turtle action figures anymore, I think maybe you should use the skins as elbow patches on a blazer. That would look nice, very professorial. Just be sure you don't wait too long, that mouse in the dresser got rotten pretty quickly. Anyway, great post. I loled. Just click on the "embed" link on Youtube, and just copy and paste the code. couldn't be easier.
Great post Kryn. And if you are making them, I'd buy a set of elbow patches for a blazer of mine. That'd look really smart I think. Regarding youtube videos, there are links to share the video on youtube on the right or sometimes below the viewer window. Click the appropriate button and it will give you a code you can embed yourself or have it do it automatically for you. Gregan, quick grammar question perhaps the family can discuss before bad habits are adopted into the Anderson lexicon (like that's something what we've been concerned about in we's family heretofore)...since LOL is laugh out loud, wouldn't it be correct to say L(ed)OL instead of LOL(ed)? Not as easy to say, but sometimes the easy way isn't always the best way.
That was nicely done. And well timed. I should have thought of that Declan stealing our attention, but it's too late at this point. He'll be old news in a couple of weeks. I'll just be patient. otters. lol.
I'm so confused! I swear I've seen an otter before, but this graph clearly shows that they're beyond the visible spectrum. Maybe I just THOUGHT I saw a real otter... anything can happen in movies nowadays. And I've probably just been watching a lot of otter-based movies. Yeah... Anyways, you probably ruined two mice's night out together. And how.
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